• Hot!

    B-MOVIE BINGO: LAST MAN STANDING

    LAST MAN STANDING (1995)
    Showing on Tuesday 4/5/2016 at The Hollywood Theatre

    Last Man Standing” stars Tim Allen as Mike Baxter, an “average Joe” who runs a sporting goods store in Denver, and who is surrounded by women—his wife and three daughters.

    Wait a sec.. wrong Wikipedia page! Ah, here we go:

    LAST MAN STANDING stars Bruce Willis as an aimless drifter during Prohibition. He drives into a small Texas bordertown and is entangled with the Irish mob and a corrupt police force. It’s up to him to free the town from the iron grip of two opposing gangs. Like A FISTFUL OF DOLLARS, it’s essentially a remake of Kurosawa’s YOJIMBO

    Damn—oh wait. Pulled up the wrong Wikipedia page again. Writing reviews is hard!

    Well, there’s no Wikipedia page for this one, so I guess I’ll have to wing it.

    LAST MAN STANDING from PM Entertainment is by far the best, most entertaining thing called LAST MAN STANDING, and that’s saying a lot (see above). We’ve been doing B-Movie Bingo for about ten years now, and if there’s one thing we’ve learned, PM Entertainment is the best at producing “A-quality films in a competitive marketplace… with increased budgets ranging from $2m-$6m.”

    According to a promo in a 1995 issue of movie industry trade magazine Screen International, LAST MAN STANDING is an “action-packed, stunt-filled movie in which more than 100 cars are destroyed.” You don’t have to tell me twice—that’s a good movie!

    Jeff WIncott (“Night Heat”, MARTIAL LAW 2) stars as the chain-smoking Kurt Bellmore, a good cop on the LAPD, but who has a tendency to play by his own rules. His partner, veteran cop “Doc”, is played by Jonathan Banks, who we all know now as Mike from “Breaking Bad”. When they’re not at Doc’s senile mom’s house (where Doc lives), they’re after a super-criminal named “Snake Underwood” (Jonathan Fuller, CASTLE FREAK, “Homeboys in Outer Space”), who LOVES being a bad guy, and proclaims to be Errol Flynn more than once. When Doc is “accidentally” killed by a corrupt cop, Kurt realizes he and his busty wife (Jillian McWhirter, PROGENY, THE DENTIST 2) are in danger from both sides of the law, as the race to see who’s the “last man standing” reaches its riveting climax.

    Directed by Joseph Merhi (EXECUTIVE TARGET, ZERO TOLERANCE).

  • Hot!

    B-MOVIE BINGO: AMERICAN HUNTER

    American HunterAMERICAN HUNTER (1988)
    Showing on Tuesday 3/1/2016 at The Hollywood Theatre

    In AMERICAN HUNTER, Chris Mitchum stars as Jake Carver, an Interpol agent and martial arts expert. While on a mission to recover microfilm that holds information that can destroy Wall Street, he meets an adversary’s secretary and falls in love with her. She is subsequently kidnapped at least four times. His nemesis, Adam (non-contact karate star Bill “Superfoot” Wallace), has a pet falcon and monkey, and can often be seen in a sweat suit. This movie is action-packed with plenty of car chases, kidnappings, denim, and Chris Mitchum on a motorcycle. The most boring part is a ten minute helicopter chase that ends in total anti-climax. Directed by Indonesian action master Arizal.

  • Hot!

    B-MOVIE BINGO: STRIKER

    STRIKER (1988)
    Showing Tuesday 2/2/2016 at The Hollywood Theatre

    STRIKER is a movie that’s been waiting around in our VHS hoard for around two years. At first, we thought it was just a pretty box, featuring an oiled-up Frank Zagarino wielding a large machine gun. We figured since most jungle-extraction plots are boring, that this movie would probably be a long, dark slog through a rain forest, with bamboo cages and dripping sweat. We were wrong!

    When we finally watched it, we were immediately curious about the credit sequence: Italian names flashed on screen. “Directed by Stephen M. Andrews.” We deemed it odd that so much of the crew had Italian names, and sure enough, the director’s name was a pseudonym. It was actually directed by Italian director Enzo G. Castellari (STREET LAW, THE HEROIN BUSTERS), who in the 1970s had great success making Italian “tough cop” movies that dominated Italian cinema. It was co-written by Umberto Lenzi (THE CYNIC THE RAT AND THE FIST, ALMOST HUMAN), another maestro of the genre. Known as “Poliziotteschi”, this subgenre of Italian cinema churned out copies of American movies like DIRTY HARRY and THE FRENCH CONNECTION. By the late 70s, Castellari had made a JAWS clone (THE LAST SHARK), and by the early 80s, a MAD MAX a rip-off (THE NEW BARBARIANS). So, it follows that by the late 80s, Castellari would be making his own Italian version of RAMBO, which was STRIKER.

    The movie features wooden, blonde beefcake Frank Zagarino as John “Striker” Slade, who is “best in extraction from hostile territories”. His weapon of choice is a slingshot with a brass knuckle grip—no wonder he’s considered the best! He’s called upon by the US government when his old war buddy turned journalist, Frank Miller, is kidnapped by the truth-silencing Nicaragua crime lord “Kariasin”. Guided by a beautiful but deadly local woman named Marta, Striker infiltrates the jungle hideout of Kariasin… and beyond!

    Frank is played by John Phillip Law (DANGER: DIABOLIK, DEATH RIDES A HORSE), who is no stranger to Italian B-movies. He’s Diabolik! Surely Striker and Diabolik would make a formidable team.

    Note: every movie we mentioned in this article is awesome. Directed by Enzo G. Castellari.

    Trailer:

     

  • Hot!

    B-MOVIE BINGO: ROBOT JOX

    ROBOT JOX (1990)
    Showing Tuesday 1/19/2016 at The Hollywood Theatre

    ROBOT JOX takes place in a time far in the distant future, after World War III. It’s been fifty years since the nuclear holocaust that obliterated civilization, and open war is forbidden—nations can no longer wage war against one another using armies. Instead, they send their top warriors to battle each other inside giant stop-motion robots.

    In this awesome future world, the surviving nations merged into two opposing factions: Market, which is pretty much America, and the Confederation, which is modeled after Russia. It seems that in this distant warless world, Alaska is no longer seen as a folly (see: Seward’s Folly, 1867), but as a valuable piece of land that warrants a robot battle.

    When the Confederation wants to claim Alaska as its own, it’s up to Market’s hero Achilles (Gary Graham, “Star Trek: Voyager”), who is oddly illiterate, to fight his robot against the Confederation’s number one comrade, Alexander. If Achilles can win, he would be allowed to retire undefeated. If he loses… Market loses Alaska!

    Directed by Stuart Gordon (RE-ANIMATOR, FROM BEYOND).

    Trailer:

     

  • Hot!

    B-MOVIE BINGO: I COME IN PEACE

    I COME IN PEACE (1990)
    Showing Tuesday 12/1/2015 at The Hollywood Theatre

    Time for a Christmas movie! I COME IN PEACE stars Dolph Lundgren (SHARK LAKE, KINDERGARTEN COP 2) as Detective Jack Caine, a cop who refuses to go by the book, and scary-looking actor Matthias Hues (CYBER ZONE, EXECUTIVE TARGET), who portrays a drug dealing alien named Talec. Talec comes to Earth to extract endorphins from human brains, in order to make a fake movie drug to sell in space. Kind of like Lundgren, he is not fluent in English, and has a weapon that’s like a razor-sharp pizza cutter boomerang.

    Caught in the middle are the White Boys, a gang of yuppie white collar drug dealers that Caine is trying to destroy. When Talec the Drug-Dealing Alien shows up and disrupts one of their drug deals, he leaves one his pizza-cutter weapons behind, and the Feds are brought in to investigate this strange piece of alien technology. Caine, who has a personal vendetta against the White Boys, is teamed up with uptight FBI agent Larry Smith (Brian Benben, “Dream On”). Needless to say, they don’t get along at all.

    When an alien cop (who can speak English) shows up to try and capture Talec, Detective Caine and Agent Smith put aside their differences (and overcome a fundamental disbelief regarding the existence of alien worlds) to take him down. If they can’t, more like Talec will come and turn Earth into a huge drug lab!

    Directed by Craig R. Baxley (ACTION JACKSON, STONE COLD).

    Trailer: